That’s what I told someone a few days ago when they insinuated that my friendship with a person, I’ll call Camron, was a possible romance. But why? Why did I feel the need to justify or label my relationship to that person and why did I devalue it?
JUST friends?! What the hell?!
Hello, I freaking love my friends. My friends are amazing, smart, loyal, sexy, and funny they are never JUST anything. Being friends is an amazing and wonderful thing. Personally, I think part of why I identify as poly is because of the high value I place on friendships.
We say we’re poly because we recognize that one individual can’t meet all our partnered relationship needs: romantic, sexual, spiritual, emotional, and so on. But, isn’t that also why we have a variety of friends? We talk with some and we shop with others. Some we go to for support and some we have deep intellectual discussions with……. and of course there’s always the one that you keep around for comedic relief and because they drink more than you do. So then, it’s not a leap to suggest that friendships are one form of poly relationships.
Most friendships are platonic but do they have to be? Why not have friendships where you can cuddle, have sex, or do any other activity you wish? I don’t believe that the physical activities you pursue with friends is what changes a friend to a partner. I think it’s more complex than that. It’s having an even deeper emotional connection as well as relationship goals and more that make someone a partner versus a friend. However, I refer back to my previous question, why do we need to justify or label it? Why can’t our relationships, platonic or not, exist simply for the joy they bring to those in it?
I think there’s power in all relationships which helps us continue to grow and develop as individuals. I think it’s healthiest to focus on what we bring to the relationship more than to focus on how others might perceive it.
So, this woman is no longer going to automatically justify any relationships. Now when people ask or insinuate something……….. let em! My life is not their business.
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